Apr 19, 2021

The divorce process is rarely, if ever, considered enjoyable but living with your spouse during the process can be absolutely excruciating and nerve-wrecking, and some people may be asking themselves why and how they will make it to the end. But, often, living together during the divorce can be efficient and cost effective. Especially if there are minor children involved.

Living with your spouse during a divorce is kind of like playing chicken with someone you may no longer trust. Each party must rely on the expectation that the other will continue to pay bills and deposit paychecks the way it was done during the marriage. Each party must rely on the expectation that the other is not going to just pick up and move out with the kids.

Any change in the status quo can quickly lead to a significant increase in each party’s attorney’s fees and stress levels because suddenly, a mini divorce is taking place within the divorce. The parties are forced to immediately address how expenses will be paid, if support will be paid from one to the other, and how to allocate parenting time while at the same time figuring out how to take one pool of income and funds and support two separate households.

Having that knowledge can help make the situation bearable. Further, it is helpful to establish boundaries and for each party to have their personal space in the home, where they can go to decompress. There are also hybrid options, such as nesting, which is where one party stays in the home on certain days while the other stays somewhere else and the children remain in the home (i.e., a relative’s home or an apartment if the parties are financially able to afford a separate apartment) and then the parties rotate.

Unless safety (physical, mental, or emotional) is a concern, living together during the process, can save the parties time and money. However, if the living situation is no longer safe, for either of the parties or their children, there is no requirement or need to continue living in the same location and there are tools attorneys can utilize to ensure that a party’s interests are protected. If you find yourself considering a divorce and have questions about the process, contact Grunyk Family Law to speak to an attorney to learn what options you have.